Chasing ... furniture?

There is now a Facebook group for all graduate students at William & Mary, which has given me the irresistible urge to write columns again. Here's my first post. We'll see how well it's received before I try another one:

OK, so this may be a law school-specific topic, but it'll give people at the other graduate schools an idea of the high level of dialogue that goes on at Marshall-Wythe. Today we were blessed with new lobby furniture, having gone without for the first five weeks of school. It has upholstery, cushions and flat surfaces on which we can place things. However, some law students — and by some I mean virtually all — have taken today to express their contempt for the new furniture. The following criticisms pervade:

1. The red chairs clash with the maroon carpet.
2. The red chairs clash with the preexisting mahogany woodwork.
3. The colors of the chairs — red and blue — have absolutely nothing to do with the school, the carpet or anything else visible in the lobby.
4. The tables are shaped like eggs.
5. The tables look like eggs.
6. The tables, unlike eggs, are not a nearly perfect food and cannot be eaten for breakfast.
7. The couches are not comfortable.
8. The chairs are not comfortable.
9. The furniture, taken as a whole, does not match the pretentiousness of a place called Marshall-Wythe, and should generally reflect a more "colonial" style.
10. There is too much furniture, which makes for clutter, and it will be difficult to move when the lobby must be cleared for social functions.

Once again, these are criticisms I heard in the first 6 hours or so that people had to react. I'm sure I'll hear more tomorrow. With the exceptions of #6 (the furniture is not edible) and #10 (the amount of furniture will make it difficult to clear the lobby), I have little sympathy for any of it. As a 1L, I am grateful to experience, for the first time, a lobby with places to sit. Despite all the criticism, my guess is that a 2L friend's hypothesis is accurate: in three years, the administration will not be able to pluck this furniture from us.

Unless, of course, they agree to sell it to us for "sentimental" value, in which case we will offer a steep, tax-deductible donation for the chance to put one of those egg-shaped tables in our $2 million condo in the City. It will be the talk of our litigating friends, and some jealous associate will offer to buy it for far more than it's worth, so that he can be the talk of the law firm.

But enough about school ...